This Friday at the Oakland Metro, see the return of International Star Christina Von Eerie take on Inter Species Wrestling’s Chris Dickinson for the “Undisputed King of Crazy Championship”

Our FTFanclub members show this past Sunday was an epic event of athletic skill and drunken mayhem.

• Johnathon Butabi defeated Dark Sheik after Referee Humperstink stopped the match declaring a TKO

• Stoner University (Stoner Bros. & Coach Joey Nuggs) defeated Charlie Chaplin and the Suburban Commandos by pinfall

• Referee Humperstink was ejected by F.O.N.G. (Fucking Obese Nerdy Gamer) & Bobby BurgerHands defeated the Peanut Butter Jelly banana after interference by the mysterious Oscar Myer Frankenwiener.

• “Streetfighter” Ken defeated “Legend of Zelda” Link with a “shoryuken” attack

• Anthony Butabi & Missy High-as-shit defeated “Ultragirl” Brittany Wonder & “Super Barrio Brother” Jesus Cruz in a match that spilled out onto the streets of San Pablo Ave.

• The day ended with a birthday cake emblazoned with a picture of Dark Sheik’s chest hair.

These special events are only for FTFanclub members, so head over to the merchandise page and join in time for our next Victory Warehouse event.

Join our fan club here, to attend our next members shows this Sunday, July 27th- Return of the Toker: International Incidents 0f  Cockblocking. This is yet another way that we show appreciation for our fans that have gone the extra step of joining the Hoodslam FTF club. These “In our Warehouse” shows have been legendary and make it so much easier for our wrestlers to try to fuck the fans.

Join the FTF fanclub to show up for the party and some wrestling, but watch out for the blow torches!

“The Top of the SkyDreamers Miracle eXstacy Cup is a point based tournament beginning in July and spanning multiple events, ending September 5th at the Oakland Metro Operahouse.

10 competitors will be split into two groups:

Block A : El Chupacabra, Anthony Butabi, Drugz Bunny, Virgil Flynn III, & Link

Block 1 : Brian Kendrick, DARK Sheik, James C, Jonathon Butabi & Ryu

All competitors will fight each other within their own groups.

Upcoming Events

• July 27th Secret Fanclub Show
• August 1st Oakland Metro
• August 23rd TBA
• Sept 5th Oakland Metro

Boyz N the Hoodslam 4
3RD FRIDAY JULY 18TH at Oakland Metro Operahouse
$10 cover, 21 & up, dontbringyourfnkids
www.birdswillfall.com, follow Hoodslam on twitter, facebook, instagram, youtube, off a cliff.

“Knowing nothing in life but to be legit…”

Four matches have been announced, all part of the Top of the SkyDreamers Miracle eXstacy Cup!

BLOCK 1 –
El Chupacabra v “Hero of Highrule” Link

Virgil Flynn III v “Knight of the Roxbury” Anthony Butabi

BLOCK A –
Ryu v Jonathon Butabi

THE Brian Kendrick v James C w/Stoney Montana

Plus OTHER SHIZZ

The summer keeps heating up, and Hoodslam rises with the mercury. Once more, you lucky souls get double the Hoodslam, DOUBLE THE FUN(K). Details, as always, are being made up on the fly. ONE THING IS FOR SURE…wait, hold on…TWO THINGS ARE FOR SURE!

THING ONE – This show will be a critical turning point in the “Top of the Sky Dreamers Miracle eXstacy Cup”…whatever that is. I mean, most of the roster doesn’t even know yet. So you know its gotta be good. Kayfabe makes the world go ’round!

Whatever it was, it began JULY 4TH, and it WILL CONTINUE through the 18th. I’m expecting at least a JVC Kaboom of the Week.

THING TWO – Well, boyz will be boyz. and girlz will be girlz. Sometimes boyz and girlz will be each other – none of this is really important to my point. Most of us were a kid some time, and a bunch of us had TVs then.

We’d gather round, searching for anything remotely captivating. Occasionally we’d score, but mostly we’d bide our time, waiting for that holy moment – Saturday Morning. Yes, the pinnacle of our childhood, the master of our domain, for most of us more sacred than church.

Sadly, those days have passed. Happily, we love nostalgia. So on the 18th, as the centerpiece to our our feast of flesh, we will pay tribute to this religious experience we called Saturday Mornings. It’ll be like Ron Burgandy’s wedding; on top of a mountain, flutes playing, trombones and flowers, and garlins of fresh herbs- and we will dance UNTIL THE SUN RISES, except YOU ARE INVITED.

We promise you’ll like it more than Anchorman 2.

BOYZ IN THE HOODSLAM 4
3RD FRIDAY @ Oakland Metro Operahouse
630 3rd Street, $10 cover, 21 & up, dontbringyourfnkids
birdswillfall.com , social media stuff/us/follow it

did i not write? ok ill write it. FUCK THE FANS!

SF Weekly just put out this fucking awesome piece on Hoodslam! Read the full article here!

Read on, lube up, and learn to relax, because we’re gonna fuck you like never before this Friday!

That’s right, we’re doing two shows at the Metro again this month too! The summer keeps heating up, and Hoodslam rises with the mercury. Once more, you lucky souls get double the Hoodslam, DOUBLE THE FUN(K).

On 4th of July, we pay tribute to this amazingly graceful hunk of freedom meat in the only twisted way we know how – debauchery and intoxication mixed with brilliant artistic expression and death defying athleticism (plus a stuffed pony we drag around). Action will be PACKED! STARS WILL BE SPANGLED!

Then on July 18th we do it again with Boyz in the Hoodslam 4! We’ll be paying tribute to a little thing we called Saturday Mornings. It’ll be like Ron Burgandy’s wedding; on top of a mountain, flutes playing, trombones and flowers, and garlins of fresh herbs- and we will dance UNTIL THE SUN RISES, except YOU ARE INVITED.

Hoodslam – Love the Game 2: Smokarina of Time is this Friday, June 20th at The Metro! Here’s some of the crazy shit that will be going down on Friday!