Hoodslam – Dionysus Affect Results

Friday, June 3, 2016
Oakland Metro Opera House
Oakland, CA
Paid attendance: 695

Live commentary by “Broseph” Joe Brody.

Musical guest: Twercules.

1. Intergalactic tag team championship tournament match: Virgil Flynn III & “The Mexican Werewolf” El Chupacabra def. The Stoner Brothers (Rick-Scott Stoner and Scott-Rick Stoner) and a pair of aliens who never made it clear what their names were (with another alien who, also, did not reveal their name) to advance in the intergalactic tag team championship tournament.

2. Otis the Gimp (with the Hooded Cobra) def. Psydsho the Clown Killer.

3. The New U (“Bonus Boy” Bobby Burgerhands and Shotzi Blakk Heartt, with Coach Joey Nuggs) def. The CAUTION (DARK Sheik and “The Talent” Ean Hancement).

4. 15-minute scramble match to determine the number one contender for the Best Athlete in the Easy Bay Golden Fannypacks: Cereal Man scored the final decision before time expired, def. James C., Ryu, Johnny “Drinko” Butabi, Pooh Jack, Player 1 Zangev and Player 2 Zangev to become the new number one contender for the Best Athlete in the East Bay Golden Fannypacks.

5. Four-way match to determine the number one contender for the Golden Gig: Anthony Butabi def. Ken, Juice Lee, and “The Patron Saint of Filth” Christina von Eerie to become the new number one contender for the Golden Gig.

6. Champion vs. Champion for the Golden Gig: Drugz Bunny (champion) def. “Ultragirl” Brittany Wonder as a result of interference from Anthony Butabi. Following the match, Brittany Wonder kicked Drugz Bunny in the dick. Immediately after, The CAUTION came out and “The Talent” Ean Hancement cashed in the Butternuts Memorial Lethal Lottery Battle Bowl Tag Team Tournament trophy for what looked like a match against a weakened Drugz Bunny for the Golden Gig. Instead, it was cashed in for a two-on-one handicap match against Brittany Wonder for the Best Athlete in the East Bay Golden Fannypacks.

7. Handicap match for the Best Athlete in the East Bay Golden Fannypacks: The CAUTION (DARK Sheik and “The Talent” Ean Hancement) def. “Ultragirl” Brittany Wonder to become the new co-holders of the Best Athlete in the East Bay Golden Fannypacks.

You can see a live stream of every first Friday show, along with every other Hoodslam ever recorded, by subscribing to the Hoodslam YouTube channel for $1.99/month (includes free two week trial). Search “Hoodslammery” on YouTube.

Hoodslam runs at the Oakland Metro Opera House every first Friday, but prior to Friday, July 1 for #America 2016, Hoodslam will run a second show in June with Hoodslam: 32x Expansion Pack on Saturday, June 11 at the Oakland Metro Opera House.

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Got pics or vids from the show? Post them with #hoodslam.

Hoodslam is a 21+ event. DON’T BRING YOUR FUCKING KIDS!

www.BirdsWillFall.com

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